Friday, May 30, 2008

But really, what are grandkids good for if they can't mix a proper drink?

I insisted they keep her. It will make Nannie happy, I said. And look, she’s so small- you couldn’t ask for a better boat sized dog. Pawpaw smiled at me then, and I was pretty sure he would keep her.
She’s some kind of mix between a rat terrier and a dachshund, I think. Small. Likes to burrow under blankets. Loves to hunt bed mice. (You know about bed mice, right? Otherwise known as MY GODDAMN FEET). Apparently she won’t eat the dog food if the grandparnts don’t cover it first in left-overs, usually chicken or steak… She’s a horrible, yappy, happy little dog and she woke me up at 5 in the fucking morning. And then again at 6, and then 7, then I gave in and got up at 8.
And where was my dog, in all of this? Amelia was trying to hide under the covers with me, occasionally looking at the little happy dog with what could only be described as polite disdain. I could almost hear Amelia thinking “I would eat you if it wasn’t so fucking early. Go away and let us sleep. I was dreaming about chickens”.

Pawpaw had a double hernia surgery yesterday. I sat with him at the hospital and spent the night at their house. They really are remarkable people. (I’ll leave the remarks to your imagination). In the recovery room I listened as Pawpaw chattered at me, trying not to feel like I was eavesdropping on his sub-conscious. He kept prefacing with “I’m probably still feeling the anesthesia, but…” What his sub-conscious had to say was funny though. And inspiring. And heartbreaking, all at the same time.

The grandparents have someone who cleans their house and cooks during the weekdays, but she’s kind of flakey. And she doesn’t, apparently, know how to fix a proper drink. I waited politely till she left the house and looked pointedly at the diet coke in a glass on the table. “Do you need your drink, Nannie?” I ask my grandma, already heading for the liquor cabinet.
“No,” she says quickly and with enthusiasm, “I need you to put something in it!”
“When did you last take a pain pill?”
“I didn’t. I’m not in pain” she lies. I shrug and fill her glass with bourbon, hand it over and watch as she politely stirs it before taking a long satisfied drink.


Pare said...


This was sweet, and good, and I guess I'm kind of hormonal because I'm a little teary.

Sigh number two.

Anonymous Amy said...

great post. thank you for giving grandma some bourbon--may she drink enough for mine!

Jackie said...

Sounds like dog karma biting you in the butt for giving them the little pooch in the first place. And you are a much better granddaughter than I! I'm keeping your blog title for that time far (it better be) in the future when I have grandkids.
p.s. you've got me interested in the book from your last post - should I start with the first or just jump in? and now i can put a face with your blog, such a sweet face too!

Maggie, Dammit said...


My Grandpa had surgery yesterday to remove his cancer. He's been on my mind constantly but I haven't been able to write about it. Your post feels like a little love letter to my heart.


Murray said...

Lovely post, there's something special about grandparents. FYI: I learned how to make a Manhattan when I was seven.